Paresh’s Blog

this may be some media overload for the day, but, holy crap, my people are awesome. its bollywood fight club. enjoy. (don’t worry, they’re all

and of course, you need some dancing:

and the NSFW version (yes, you read that right, the NSFW version of a bollywood trailer):

so, i was at the library doing some practice multiple choice questions yesterday and every so often i come across a question that really makes me wonder about the caliber of person writing these practice questions. here’s one i liked one question so much, i thought i’d share (i’m using strikethrough on certain words/phrases so i don’t start getting more comment spam than i already get):

In a jurisdiction which statutorily defines the felony of “sexual assault” as “any act of sexual intercourse or sexual interaction performed on or with another person without that person’s consent,” Dove, a physician, performed oral copulation upon Nobs, her patient, while the two were alone in an examining room. Under which of the following circumstances is Dr. Dove LEAST likely to be convicted of sexual assault upon Nobs?

(A) Although Nobs did not give consent to perform the act of oral copulation, after he had thought about it for a couple weeks, he decided that he had enjoyed the experience and did not want Dove to be prosecuted.

(B) Nobs had agreed to permit the act of oral copulation after Dove explained that the act was necessary to prevent future prostate trouble.

(C) Nobs was sedated throghout the act of oral copulation and did not realize that it had occurred until so informed by one of Dove’s nurses, who had surreptitiously observed the entire event.

(D) As Nobs lay supine on an examining table, Dove erected a cloth screen over Nobs’ abdomen and informed Nobs that an electric suction device would remove a specimen of semen and sperm for medical testing purposes. When Nobs consented to this procedure, Dove performed the act of oral copulation.

The answer, in case you’re curious (its hidden text for all you cheaters, so highlight after the colon to see it): B

there was another question i saw over the summer in a different book from the same company that was just as questionable but i’m far too lazy to find it now. but just know that it involved a guy coming home from work, his wife asking him what he wanted for dinner and his reply was “i want to rape the lady next door!” and it only got worse from there.

it appears i’ve been tagged by alex and i’ll join in the fun. its the shortest one of these i’ve ever seen and it doesn’t even require me to log on to myspace.

Four Jobs I’ve Had:
1. Al Bundy at Macy’s Newpark
2. Sales Associate pleeb at OfficeMax
3. College Computer Support in a Media Lab
4. Research Assistant for a book on death penalty law

Four Movies I Can Watch Over and Over:
1. Golden Child
2. Patton
3. Office Space
4. Monty Python and the Holy Grail

Four Two Places I’ve Lived:
1. Union City, CA
2. Davis, CA

Four TV Shows I Love:
1. The Simpsons
2. Nova (yes, i’m a dork)
3. Family Guy
4. This Old House/Ask This Old House (i’d list a lot more if i could)

Four Places I’ve Vacationed:
1. India
2. London/Oxford, England
3. New York City
4. Tijuana, Mexico (that’s right, my parents thought TJ would be a fun excursion)

Four of My Favorite Dishes:
1. Fettucini Alfredo
2. Masala Dosa (probably the only indian dish my mom can’t make)
3. Cheese Quesadilla with tomato, cilantro and jalapenos
4. indian-style sauteed potatoes with indian tortillas (the best i can describe it in english)

Four Places I’d Rather Be:
1. My grandfather’s place in India
2. London/Oxford
3. Any place I’ve seen on Globe Trekker
4. Work (i know it sounds bad, but not so much when you’re broke and have loans to pay)

Four Three Books I Could Read Over and Over (its been a looong time since i’ve read for fun):
1. Any of the old Perry Mason novels by Erle Stanley Gardner
2. haha, my Simpsons episode guides (in my defense, my sister bought me all three for my birthday)
3. The General’s War (total poli sci book but it has good insights considering the mess we’re in right now)

Four Albums I Couldn’t Live Without
1. The Killers: Hot Fuss
2. Metallica: S & M
3. The Dhol Foundation: Big Drum, Small World
4. Trapt: Trapt (i’d list more if i could)

UPDATE (Missed One): Four Things I Want to Do Before I Die:
1. Argue before the actual Supreme Court (i’d like to win too, but i’m not gonna be greedy)
2. Build a top o’ the line media room (i drool everytime they build an ultra-posh $250k media room on This Old House)
3. Invent something that really changes things (let me know if i can be more vague)
4. Take 6 months and basically hitch hike around the world. no itinerary, no tour groups, no family obligations to visit everyone we know. just wing it.

Four Two Bloggers I’m Tagging:
1. Andy - neuspeak.net
2. Diana - MiSSDiANA

so this is hilarious. before you click play, you should know there are 2 main characters. one is a bumbling, awe-struck, semi-coherent mess….and the other is an 11 year old girl. thanks to big al for the link which i am finally getting around to posting.

Report: ‘Full House’ star was hooked on meth - Celebrity News - MSNBC.com

oh, how tgif has fallen. surprised? me either. i’d take up meth too if dave coulier got more work than i did. the best part of this story is that mary kate olson was part of the intervention. do you think they had concurrent interventions or one after the other?

uncle jesse: ok, now that we’ve convinced steph that she needs to go into rehab, we have one more intervention.
mary kate: really? who?
dave coulier (as popeye): its someone that hasn’t been eating enough spinach or anything else.
mary kate: do you mean DJ?
danny tanner: no, we already had an intervention for dj’s eating disorder.
mary kate: awwww nuts.